I'm feeling really stressed right now. I'm surrounded by people but I feel such a lack of happiness. School is so stressful, and I really don't know if I'm going to be getting straight A's this term, although I really need to and want to. Christmas is also really stressing me out. Maybe I'm just being totally selfish, but I just can't seem to come to terms with the fact that Christmas is going to suck this year. There's not going to be much money for any presents, and I'm probably going to end up buying everything that I've been wanting by myself later on sometime. I think it would help me if I just stopped talking out loud about it though. Maybe if I just decide to give to other people instead of expecting so much from people, Christmas might be better that way. I've been thinking about doing the 12 Days of Christmas to someone, I don't know who yet. That's probably so cheesy but It's the only thing I can think of that might make me a better person somehow. I don't know if I deserve to be better or to be happier. Oh well. Today was a really long day. I've really been thinking about quitting my job lately, but I just need to earn a lot more money before I do quit. I want to get up to at least 1,000 in my savings before I quit. Right now, since I've spent a little bit lately, they're down to about 600. I'm thinking around my birthday I'll quit, which is in about two months. If I earn at least 50 each week for those 8 weeks, I can earn 400, which will bring me to 1,000. That should be pretty easy too, because 50 is sort of the lowest I've ever gotten, and that was only a few times, when I'm really horrible at work. If I do really well, and get around 90 each week, I can earn something around 700 more. I think one of the main problems with myself is the fact that I tend to overload myself way too much by looking too much to the future and all of the things I have to do, thus causing me much more stress than is really necessary. I really just need to stop being really selfish and sucking all the time. I think I'm done here for today.